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Warcraft Sues - Fear for your Lore

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A Warcraftsues Glossary (WiP) [Feb. 23rd, 2007|06:36 pm]
Warcraft Sues - Fear for your Lore


Over the months, we’ve managed to pile up a fair number of running gags and random terminology. So I figure its time to compile it all into one wall of text and update it on occasion.

This is what I have so far, but I’m happy to accept suggestions for more or edits to existing entries. So feel free to poke away and I’ll try to edit into a coherent whole. Ha.

Amnesiac: Probably the most cheesily overused plot device in all of WoW RPdom. A blatant Sue trait.

Angstmuffin: also Emosponge, a character that seems to do nothing but angst to genrrate attention, sympahty and comfort smex. Typically, they will suffer a Disease of the Week and, if Alliance-Side, hang around the Emowell.

Apologist: Someone who insists that their Faction or Race (especially the Forsaken) are always right and are the “good guys”, regardless of the evidence to the contrary. (eg slaughtering Farmers, poisoning crops, killing refugees etc). Often accompanied by some spectacular leaps of logic. (eg “The evil nasty Hillsbrad farmers drove the poor innocent Forsaken off their lands, and now we’re merely trying to get it back.” Yes, I saw this once)

Beloved Peasant Village: Also known as an Incendiary Village; being a village (or small town, or camp, or what have you) that is called into existence solely to be cruelly (and often inexplicably) wiped out with the Sue being the only survivor. Of course, Warcraft has plenty of places that have been wiped out over the course of the last 30 years which should mean that the BPV isn't necessary.

Blood Elf RP: Blood Elves are probably the consistently worst RPed race in WoW, mainly due to the simple jumps of logic involved by players. By spending, oh, five minutes walking around it, any player with half a brane would realise that Silvermoon is not some sparkly fairy kingdom but 1984 with Pointy Ears and Magic. It is an oppressive police state that tries to maintain a façade of decency while covering the oppression of its people and the hideous things they do in the name of survival.

However, the majority of Blood Elves are played as happy and nice people who would never ever think of doing anything bad to anyone, and act like they’re living in the Spiffiest Place on Azeroth. To make matters worse, the few that do acknowledge that the place is Not Nice tend to walk around announcing “KAEL ARE TEH SUK” to anyone who cares to listen, largely ignoring the fact that, if they ran with the consequences, they’d probably end up getting a red-arse beatdown.

Brane: Deliberate misspelling of Brain. What Scourge eat when Happening.

Carebear: In an RP sense, can mean several things.

1) The idea that all RP is good, regardless of content, and that, by simply RPing, you are automatically a good person and exempt from criticisim. By extension, doing any idiotic thing you want is perfectly fine, as it’s a bad thing for people to critisise you for your own stupidity.

2) Anyone who’s RP is designed to make sure that nobody ever gets hurt or upset or even sad. A Carebear RPer will go out of the way to make sure their character is happy at all times and, more to the point, never does anything that might vaguely upset anyone else. At their most extreme, Carebear RPers will be willingly dragged into anything because they’re too nice to say “no”.

3) And RPer who serves as a magic solution to any given problem another character may be suffering, such as their Disease of the Week. No matter what may ail a character, five minutes talk with one of these will make everything all better, even if that wasn’t the plan. These sorts of Rpers can cure everything from death to schitzophrenia to a rainy day with a few kind words and some godmode emotes.

Cassa-Forking-Nova: (Polite version) A chracter's who's RSP/description emphasies how handsome, manly and good in bed they are, typically in a way that makes them appear to be mroel ike an arse then anyhting else.

Cross-Faction Dressing: Where a chracter disguises themselves through various means (magical, makeup, sheer wtffery) as a member of another race of the opposite faction. Usually (but not exclusively) Night Elves disguised as Blood Elves or Trolls, or vice versa. Of course, this fails to take into account issues auch as size or mass (the average Blood Elf being a foot and a half shorter then a Night Elf and weighing maybe half as much), but logic seems to be the least of the concerns here. Oddly enough, female Troll disguises are allways Cutefases.

Typically, this "disguise" is an Alt of the main character, and often ends up playing the part of a blatant Sockpuppet.

This trend reached its peak at the release of BC when a zillion or so Alliance RPers decided to roll Belf Alts and take their overwrought Sue chracters with them. More then a few ended up with the resultant Belf becoming their main. That's fine by me.

Cutefase: Note deliberate misspelling. A “Cutefase” (Or Cuteface if you must) is a female Troll using that one face that 99% of Female Troll characters seem to use. Usually it’s combined with the smallest and most discrete tusk model available and that one long hair model with the ponytail to produce a result like this. Walk around Oggrimmar and you’ll see dozens of them.

As if to underscore the point, Cutefases will often be accompanied by a Wall of Text that describes just how beautiful they are.

A Cutefase with the smallest tusks is still a Cutefase, regardless of hairstyle. A “Half Cutefase” will have the cute face, but different hair and/or tusks

Demon Possession: A close second to Amnesia in gratuitous overuse, but usually a lot more Lore-Crushing. Using the majority of cases as a guide, it would seem that the Burning Legion has nothing better to do then to possess random Humans and Night Elves and have lots of hot, sweaty, two-girl action. Another Sue trait.

Disease of the Week: Another classic bad RP standby; in this case it refers to characters who seem to constantly be mangled by their players in order to garner sympathy and make them the centre of attention. On a seemingly routine basis, the character will die, be possessed, be severely mutilated, be excommunicated or the like. This will require that everyone drops everything that they are doing and come to the Emowell to give the character hugs until they get better.

Dull Surprise: Descriptive of the facial expression of a Cutefase. Also descriptive of many shocking revelations that, well aren't shocking at all. See also: Dull Surprise.

Emo Troll: Trolls, specifically Cutefases, who engage in self-mutilation. Think about it and you'll realise how silly it is.

Emowell: also Emoonwell. The Moonwell in Stormwind, a favoured place for people to hang out and angst. Site of many a bad RP.

ERP: Erotic Role-Play, or, more blatantly, teh cyb0rz. An ERPer is someone who "role plays" sexual encounters, but more often then not is someone who's focus is on ERP encounters. That there are dedicated ERP guilds is disturbing enough, but the idea of dedicated Horde ERP guilds that existed before Burning Crusade came out is just... icky.

Freaky Hybrid: A character who is a hybrid of two different races, specifically two who shouldn't be able to have children. A Half-Elf, Half-Human is a Hybrid, a Half-Orc, Half-Naga is a Freaky Hybrid. Yes this happened. My poor, poor brane.

As a general rule of thumb, if it results in bad, bad mental images, it’s a Freaky Hybrid. By default, any sort of Half-Demon falls into this category.

Freerange Orc: An Orc who was never in an internment camp. They may have been born to free parents, been a part of a Trabe that were never captured or simply grew up safely nestled away in Alterac Valley away from the evil bad Alliance. Looking at RP backstories, it would seem that Thrall was about the only Orc ever imprisoned.

Game Logic: In fanfic (and character biographies to a lesser degree) where events occur as if they were happening in the World of Warcraft game, as opposed to the fictional world. While the two could be argued to be one and the same, it is clear that WoW has numerous concessions to "in-world" logic to make it viable as a game. In the "real" Azeroth, people wouldn't just wait around for Hogger to respawn.

Examples of Game Logic include:

*Characters being able to sustain incredible amounts of damage before dying/being knocked out, simply because that's what happens in game

*Opponents not noticing or reacting to the character until attacked (ie, aggroed)

*Characters comparing themselves in power (ie, level) to opponents

*Use of resurrection spells (Which are clearly not present in actual Warcraft canon. Otherwise there'd be a huge list of characters, staring with king Laine, who'd still be alive)

If a character ICly says something like "I'm not ready to kill VanCleef as I don't have the quest yet", then they're using Game Logic.

Grimtotem: Several RP servers are over-run with Taurens who are RPed as members of the Grimtotem Clan, if not the actual Grimtotem family. Kids, you can be a black-furred Turen without being a Grimmy, you know.

Half-Elf: Annoying but regrettably canon. The result of the union between a Gary Stu and his Sockpuppet High Elf and Human, the result looks kinda like a High Elf but has the lifespan of a human. Take that, you mutant freaks!

Half-Night Elf: While not biologically impossible, Half-Night Elf is both Lore Crushing and a definite Sue trait. As Night Elves have been secluded from the rest of the world for ten thousand years and apparently didn't even know of humans before the Third War, any Half Night Elf would be no more then three or four years old and incredibly rare. Yet, walk around Stormwind and you'll see a few dozen of them, and all adults.

A variation is the Half-Night, Half-Blood (or High) Elf. Just as Lore Crushing as a half Night Elf, half Human, it also has the drawback that a Night Elf would more likely spork a High/Blood Elf as anything else. Yet they are also distressingly common.

Happy Forsaken: The Forsaken as often depicted in fanfics and RP. Usually seen as poor, tragic individuals who are just trying to survive in a brutal, cold and cruel world. Not only are they presented with the utmost sympathy, they are usually distressingly friendly, pleasant and cheerful. Happy Forsaken were never bad people before they died, and usually suffered an especially tragic and/or lengthy demise.

The writers/players of Happy Forsaken will often overlook such things as poisoning food supplies, killing innocent farmers, invading the Arathi basin, using captive humans as combat training and planning to engineer a plague to wipe out all life on Azeroth, their supposed Horde allies included. The Happy Forsaken are typically lead by Sylvie W.

Highborne: A grossly mis-used term. Often used by Blood Elf sues to indicate that their character is a Highborne and, as such, 10,000 or so years old. This disregards the fact that their character a) Would still look like a Night Elf and b) Would have died of old age about 8,000 years ago.

Huntard: The typical bad hunter who Auto-Shots his way to level 70. Like Shadow Priests they are typically bastions of bad RP and worse PvE. Finding a good Hunter on an RP server is dman near impossible.

Huntards can often be spotted by their Season 1 PvP Shoulders. (As opposed to the Season 2 Shoudlers which are cool, dammit)

Japacheese: Overdone, clichéd fanboy Japanese that frequently appears in fanfic and role-playing. The premise goes that, by using a Japanese word or name, something purportedly becomes automatically kewler. Usually these are things like “Ryuu” (Dragon), “Kami” (Devil/demon), “Kuro” (black) and the like which are already grossly overused in English. And often they are rammed in with absolutely no thought as to how they should actually be used.

(Yes, all you huntards who tamed Humar and called him Kuroneko, I’m looking at you)

Lesbian: While not nessicarily aginst Lore, most of the time Gay/Lesbian chracters are an effort to impose modern (and when I say modern, I mean 1990s-onward) beliefs about sex and sexuality on what is, in essence, a pseudo-medieval to renaissance setting.

Being honest, none of WoW's cultures are likely at that stage of development. The only society that'd likely have something resembling today's degree of sexual permissiveness is going to be the Forsaken - and that's because, to them, gender is more of a matter of "what you were before you died, assuming that the bits are still there."

It doesn't help that the majority of characters RPed as Lesbians in WoW seem to be men who either a) Are dumb and horny or b) are too insecure to play a female character in a straight relationship. Yes, you know who you are.

Lore Crushing: Also Continuity Crushing. A character who's background makes no sense whatsoever within the boundaries of the Lore, and cannot be happily explained away or accounted for. An Orc who was born in Ogrimmar can be fixed with a handy patch. A female Night Elf who had a High Elf father, was raised by wild Nightsabers, spent hundreds of years learning to be a druid, has an evil clone, likes to Cross-Faction Dress as a (Cutefase) Troll and was replaced by their dopple from an Alternate Universe is Lore Crushing. (Yes, this happened)

Luminous Orbs: Sometimes known as eyes. Luminous Orbs are what Mary Sue characters use to see with. Luminous Orbs are usually of an exotic colour, resemble some sort of precious stone and may even change colour depending on the character’s mood. They also frequently can be more then one colour or mismatching colours.

The term is also used by RAK in his novels. Think about it.

Quasi-Canon: Something from a secondary or rather dodgey source of Lore, or one that has been clearly retconned. The RPG, especially the old Warcraft d20 edition, is a good example of a Quasi-Canon source.

The term can also refer to something that has been apparently dropped from Lore. Caria Menethil, Arthas’ older sister who appears only in one novel and is never referenced again, is a good example.

Pirates: Any given male Troll will inevitably end up being RPed as a pirate. This is not nesscarily a bad thing, mind you.

Privacy Invasion: Using the Armory to investigate a character featured on WCS, often for the purposes of Lulz. The idea is to see wheather the chracter profile given can actually even remotely match in-game acheivements.

"A quick privacy invasion revealed that this allegeldy awesomely powerful warlock is, in fact, level 12"

RAK: Richard A. Knaak; author of Day of the Dragon, the War of the Ancients trilogy and the Sunwell Saga as well as a trillion or so other really bad fantasy novels. RAK's Warcraft books read like bad fanfic; not only do they painfully clash with established lore but they feature Rohin, who is one of the most blatantly gratuitous examples of Author Insertion possible.

Random Bandits: General purpose marauders and pillagers who kill friends, lovers and relatives in the name of character backstory. In force, they’re usually responsible for the destruction of a Beloved Peasant Village.

RAR! I eat teh Brane: The sound of Scourge Happening

Rohin: See RAK. No, really.

RSP Sue: A chracter with a Mary Sue-esque FlagRSP description. Can also apply to MyRP and other RP-related addon.

S&M: Shackles and Maidens, a particularly infamous ERP guild. Its characters can be distinguished by particularly bad Wall of Text RSPs that not only godmod how your character reacts to them, but also look like they were typed one-handed by thirteen year-old fanboys.

Sacrificial Naaru: The belief amongst Blood Elf RPers that M’uru is in Silvermoon voluntarily and is letting the Blood Knights steal his powers for their own twisted ends. This assumption seems to (deliberately?) ignore the facts of the situation, such as the statements that the Blood Elves captured the Naaru and that it is violently trying to escape.

Shadow Spec: also Emo Spec. Sadly common in Priest RP, characters will respect to shadow because they’re feeling emo and want attention. Unfortunately, as shadow is one of the hardest specs of any class to play well (and easiest to play badly) most of these people are, well, awful at it.

On an RP server, the odds against getting a good Shadow Priest are astronomical

Sockpuppet: In a RP term, a character, usually an alt, who exists only to make the primary character look more awesome and prop up their storyline. If a character’s biography is mostly dedicated to how they spent all their time learning how to be awesome from someone else, or if their RP is constantly talking about another character, odds are on they’re a sockpuppet.

Sylvie W: Sylvannas Windrunner as she appears in Fanfics. Usually, she's mischaracterized as being either a sensitive and compassionate leader who cares about her people, some sort of angstbunny who just needs some huggles or basically kissing the local Stu's butt. Most distressingly, she often shows up as the mother of the Sue of the Second.

Then, Scourge Happens: The tendency for Scourge to suddenly materialise out of seemingly nowhere, usually in mass numbers. It happens surprisingly often in fics. The term comes from a summary of the Dragon Hunt Graphic Novel's end:

Aneeva: Let's go to Tarren Mill!
They go to Tarren Mill
Then, Scourge Happens.
Scourge: RAR! I eat teh Brane!

Trabe: A tribe (Or Clan or similar orgnisation) that was created by a player for their character's background. Different from just being from a single family, a Trabe exists usually to make the character seem that much more important. The Darkspears are a tribe, but the Sparklypoos (of which the character is the last known member or heir to the tribe or whatever) are a Trabe.

General characteristics of Trabes include "Kewl" sounding names, living in an inappropriate location (eg, Tauren in the Burning Steppes) and avoiding disasters that befell others of their race (eg Orcs who were never corrupted or remained free at the end of the second war). Trabes often dwell in Beloved Peasant Villages

Trabes, at their most extreme, can reach the size of entire fictional nations.

Vereesa Windrunner: "Heroine" of Day of the Dragon in the loosest possible way; she is a Sockpuppet who exists mainly to be Rohin's snugglebunny and produce half-Elven brats. Obstinately the sister of Sylvannas and Alleria Windrunner, she has been conspicuously absent in primary Warcraft Canon. Her only other appearance is a brief spot in Tides of Darkness where she cries and has to be bailed out by her older sisters.

Waif: A Forsaken, usually female, who while dead does not appear to show it. Rather then being horribly mangled with exposed bones, hunched backs and saggy boobs, Waifs will be just beautiful, ephemeral creatures who are, if anything, more attractive then they were in life. Usually this will be conveyed in a Wall of Text.

Wall of Text: A FlagRSP description that is excessively large. While it could be used to describe any RSP that goes beyond the 150 Word Cutoff, the worst cases are those that have mountainous paragraphs of purple prose describing every aspect of the character in elaborate detail.

"Wall of Text Crits you for 4,691 damage"

White on White: A female Night Elf with white hair and white skin. That’s white, not peach. (Peach skin is cool). Remarkably common, especially amongst rogues and shadow priests. Usually a sign of Sue, and often a bad player to boot.

If your PuG includes a White-on-White Shadow priest, run. Fast.

Wiki: Also Server Wiki or Fan Wiki. A Wiki project set up for a specific community, server, RP guild or so forth. Usually a repository for drama queening, attention whoring and forum strife. Occasionally, they are used for actual information.

Not to be confused with WoWWiki which is mostly good. Well, apart from the Worgen obsession.

Wiki Cyberman: Whenever character biographies or RSPs of Warcraftsues subjects vanish or are drastically re-written, they are the victim of a Wiki Cyberman. Taken from the Cybermen's battle cry of DELETE DELETE DELETE, the Wiki Cyberman seems to be a force for good.

Wiki Sue: A Sue profiled from a Wiki entry. Usually the subject of Privacy Invasions and, seemigly inevitably, the Wiki Cyberman.

Zul'jin: Is an enemy of the Horde and a bad guy. Deal with it.

From: netami
2007-02-26 11:04 pm (UTC)
Very informative; I thought you just didn't know how to spell brain.

Slap luminous orbs on there, too, I thought it meant shiny boobs.

Also you're terrible people :P
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[User Picture]From: mecheon
2007-02-27 06:37 am (UTC)
We may be terrible, but at least we do it well
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[User Picture]From: mecheon
2007-03-01 08:02 am (UTC)
Don't forget to mention that all Half Nelves are full-grown adults generally

And don't forget B/N Elves, seeing as I have no doubt they'll increase in popularity soon enough
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[User Picture]From: dncingmalkavian
2008-09-16 12:26 am (UTC)
I'll fully admit that my main is a quarter nelf. But that's the only sue trait I've adapted in any of my toons, really, so I don't feel so bad about it.
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[User Picture]From: cognoscere
2007-03-31 08:08 pm (UTC)
I think it says something about me that I read this and went "Ahaha! I do that! ...Oh wait. -Dammit-."

Admittedly, my wall o' text description for my night elf is paragraphs of "no really, she's ugly and built like a two-by-four! No boobs! No ass! And she hasn't bathed in a year!", and in fanfiction the And Then, Scourge Happens is kind of unavoidable when your characters are in the Argent Dawn.

But this is a handy checklist of things I should be avoiding. ^^;;; *goes to edit her flagRSP descriptions...*
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[User Picture]From: deathchibi
2007-04-08 02:03 am (UTC)
I have an amnesiac blood elf, but it's due to a blow to the head she took, so sometimes she'll just stare into space, react inappropriately or drool now and then. >_>
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[User Picture]From: halogin
2007-04-08 07:36 am (UTC)
Well, in defense of some, not everyone knows the entire Warcraft lore/history. *L* I've done research as I could, but I've never read books, and have only had websites to go by. That said, I try not to stomp all over then piddle on lore. ;-)

...And my night elf (Holy) priest is pale-skinned with white hair in a braid... I just thought it was pretty. *LOL* And she's not on a RP server, so I just made the pretty for pretty's sake....
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[User Picture]From: aleros
2009-04-09 02:53 pm (UTC)
Lore Relative: That character that is the lost daughter of Jaina and Thrall, or Jaina and Medivh; the lost third Stormrage Sibling, the father/son/brother of Kael'Thas/Saurfang/Thrall. Almost always accompanied by Wall of Text and Luminous Orbs. Someone who really can't think of an original and interesting character concept so they have to make them a relative/close friend to a major lore figure that already does have an interesting story. Their entire roleplay generally revolves around the fact that they are a relative or close friend of said major lore figure.

Just think of that person that tells everyone they're distantly related to JP Morgan.
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[User Picture]From: gizzybiscuits
2009-05-18 06:25 pm (UTC)
Was an interesting read, I learned a bit :3. I'm guilty of some of those though (Like my Forsaken are a laa-dee-daa happy bunch and none of them seem like the 'Death to the living!' type unless they're having a Scarlet for dinner) soooo it gives me something to work on.
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[User Picture]From: summertimesongs
2010-07-04 03:04 am (UTC)
Awww, I play a Shadow priest. lol. I like to think I'm at least halfway decent (that is, I have a cast order that generally allows me to...uh...not die?) but very few people tear themselves down, so maybe I'm not and just think I am.

People always want me to be healer, though. I suck at healing so hard....
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From: rhianyablack
2010-07-10 01:59 am (UTC)
<<Is an exception to the Shadow Priest Def. My toon: Has the ugliest face in the game (The angry middle-aged one). Has the biggest tusks she can have, pointing upwards towards her eyes (I'd make them bigger if Blizz would let me.) Has a mohawk (This alone should qualify her XD). Never, ever, ever RP's in Shadowform. Pulls a consistant and respectable 3rd place to 2 well-geared Survival Hunters in my guild, on our ICC 10 man raid (and has healed from Marrowgar to Putricide, as well as Valithria, in her Shadow gear, as Holy spec). But translating her accent gives me a migraine. Is there an easy "How to talk like a troll without looking like a drunk Jamaican" thread?
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